[xXBADGERXx]

Welcome to the world of Xbox Live.....here is where Mr Badger takes you by the hand and guides you through the world of Online Xbox flavoured gaming .

1. When Joining a room for the very first time on Xbox Live ......

DO NOT! Yell into the microphone "HELLO HELLO CAN ANYONE HEAR ME!" - if you look at the connector box for your headset communicator and the little light is GREEN (or the Switch is flicked to the RIGHT for 360 users), then there`s a good chance everyone can hear you . When people have stopped talking try to introduce yourself and explain that it`s your first time on Live . People can be very sympathetic to a new Live user (new beginner=newbie=noob.....often spouted by some spotty overseas obese adolescent) . In a lot of cases this may be the place where you can make new friends too by showing that you are indeed a nice person and not a complete Ignoramus .

Whilst I am on the subject of headsets ........ on the connection box that goes into the back of the pad is a mute button , press this and it turns RED (Merely flick the Switch to the LEFT for 360 users). You are now muted . DO! press this button when you need to adjust your headset as the mic is very sensitive and everyone HATES having to listen to someone adjusting a headset and fumbling around . Before you even start a game make sure the headset is on and in a comfortable position . My top tip for when you need to visit the toilet or even leave your Xbox momentarily is to unplug the headset from the back of the pad and tuck the connector into a pocket . When you return you slap it back into the pad and hey presto all is well with the world . No noisy fumbling and other such rubbish whilst you adjust your headset and annoy people and the added bonus is that everyone can see when you are away or have returned , personally I take my new 360 wireless pad with me so everyone can hear the gentle splashing of me emptying my bladder
The mute button can also be pressed for these circumstances ......

Yelling at the Kids/Spouse/Dog (nobody wants to hear your personal grievances on Live .
When someone tells you that you are breathing hard into the mic (tap the mute button and adjust the headset so it isn`t right into a nostril/mouth) ....... NOT so much of a problem on 360 as the OFFICIAL Mic has some form of Noise Reduction built into it .
Having a coversation with someone who is physically in the room you are in (we don`t give a damn what your real life buddies have to say about the game - if they were so good at this then they would have bought an Xbox too)
Answering the phone (tap/slide THAT BUTTON people , we don`t wanna hear what you have to say to other people on the phone it`s rude to them and it`s rude to us.....have some self respect!)

[xXBADGERXx]

2. When playing a game or in a Lobby ..........

DO NOT! sing your favourite song into the mic or even WHISTLE songs into it . Not everyone enjoys your taste in music and no matter how good it sounds in YOUR head , it just doesn`t sound the same to us . In fact whistling! , do you really actually go around whistling songs ..... all it is really is a form of making yourself be heard , security guards do it so that intruders can hear them and they don`t have to tackle them or get into a fight . Your parents do it `cos they`re OLD ........ Just DON`T ok!
DO! make full use of the Xbox`s capability to store your favourite music and enjoy it whilst playing your favourite game . Listen to it at a reasonable level so that it doesn`t create "fluffing" on the mic (where the volume level isn`t loud enough to be picked up by the mic and goes FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF) . The mic is sensitive but anything too loud gets distorted and it`s hard for users to actually hear what you are playing anyway . By the way ..... the name "fluffing" was something that just sprang to mind to describe the sound........ no-one actually calls it this , and apparently it means something else in a certain type of film industry . What you are trying to do here is keep a nice and harmonious room ... if this is done , people will stay in the same lobby for HOURS and great fun and hilarity will ensue (I use some quite big words sometimes and some of you may need a dictionary ) .

[xXBADGERXx]

3. General Xbox use in the home in a LIVE situation .....

This section is just general advice for improving connection whilst using Live . If you are sharing a line with a PC it`s generally recommended that you turn off bandwidth hogging programs . It`s not a good idea to have programs like KAZAA , WinMX , BitTorrent and other such peer-to-peer programs running . These programs hog your bandwidth that`s used to upload/download the postion of your character/vehicle and your voice and other users . If this is impeded in any way you will cause LAG! (where your character/vehicle stutters or the game halts or you even appear in a place where you just were or are going to) . This can also effect the voices heard or spoken during a game and causes major breakup . If you need to download films/mp3`s/latest warez then do it when you are not on live , best of all do it when you are asleep like I do as you can maximise your bandwidth and leave more time for playing games with buddies . MAX THAT LINE OUT PEOPLE! before they introduce download capping .
When you are confident enough you will one day get around to hosting a game . Now being a good host starts with having enough Bandwidth to comfortably handle the amount of players in your room . If everyone followed the above advice then it should all run smoothly . You can tell in a room who is running PC software at the same time as playing Live as they will just skip about all over the place . DO! ask them nicely if they are running such stuff and to turn it off . If , after this opportunity and within a reasonable time , they haven`t done so then BAN THEIR LAGGY CONNECTION out of the game after explaining to them why. They won`t hold it against you and the people in your room will appreciate it and give you good feedback for hosting a tight room . The banned person may even learn from this and become a better person .

[xXBADGERXx]

4. Xbox LIVE Vision users .

Whilst playing such tremendous games such as UNO on Xbox LIVE , DO have fun and have a good time whilst "Chilling" with fellow players . DO plug your camera in , if you have one , and take the next step into Microsoft`s wonderful community . DO NOT yell "WHOAH!!!!! SHE`S A HOT CHICK" whenever a Female enters the room ...... chances are you will scare them off . DO NOT constantly hit on them as this will annoy your fellow gamers IMMENSELY and they will probably leave . Women like to game as much as the next man . DO have a good time and keep that room rolling , after all it`s about playing together as well as against each other .

NOW for the part that REALLY disturbs me . DO NOT sit there in a dressing gown that can "ACCIDENTALLY" fall open when you stand up , I DO NOT WANNA see your "Meat and 2 Veg" ............ and whilst I`m on the subject .............. TIDY YOUR DAMN ROOM!!!!!!! whilst you are at it .

DO download the PGR and Kameo decks as there are great "Stitch" up functions in those decks that give you the ability to see another players cards or swap your nasty Humongous pile of cards for someone elses small and meagre , hence, winning Cards

[xXBADGERXx]

This article was originally published HERE , but I felt that this could do with going around on the News Feeder and maybe bring in some more inspiration from around the world

[Nbkrooney]

Well done badger..now if only this could be published world wide

[DJ-Jonesy]

Nbkrooney, on Mar 5 2007, 09:54 AM, said:

Well done badger..now if only this could be published world wide

If it was published world wide then you never no we could have a GOOD game without some people being annoying and doing all of wat badger said.

[DTS Mr CaLi]

i like singing to fellow gamers

good stuff though Mr Badger

[(MRC)M@Ginty]

xXBADGERXx, on Mar 5 2007, 02:55 AM, said:

TIDY YOUR DAMN ROOM!!!!!!!

Thats never going to happen.

[xXBADGERXx]

Funny you should say that , I`ve just been spring cleaning and taking my OWN "Advice"

[BG Daz]

Badge you need to do an update for 360 users We no longer have a little red button

[Nbkrooney]

I Daz I, on Mar 5 2007, 11:06 PM, said:

Badge you need to do an update for 360 users We no longer have a little red button

I swear I saw him mention the switch for the new mics as well as the button on the old ones

[xXBADGERXx]

I did ...... "Can`t Read , Won`t Read"

[Nbkrooney]

I'm not seeing things as well as hearing voices then